Still struggling to create, still struggling over all. So, I’ll share another poem I wrote a while back. Thank God I have this stuff to pass along on off days. My apologies for this deviation from the normal fare. I hope this gives you another sense of who I am as a writer.
Summers I plant petunias
arrange them on porches
and watch from front windows
The burrowing of cats
the almost gray
of almost morning
The lawn is mowed
The hedges trimmed and
I am haunted
By the rose which is not a rose
By the rose which is not a rose
call it yellow
paying homage to palms
I do not know you
I do not know myself
We are in ruin among the apple seeds
Wow. That is powerful. What lovely and sorrowful imagery. I think I like Kathy the poet.
a searing poem…
and beautiful, haunting.
but, about this angst…
step away from the stats for a few days.
step away from the connectedness.
get a journal…and go do what you can…and be with yourself.
This blogging thing, the community, the instant gratification of it…
it’s like meth. I don’t say that lightly…I struggle with it…and then, on the days my soul needs quiet…I worry and rock back and forth (exaggerating only slightly) because I fear/want/need/desire/worry/hope and fear again that I won’t have anything, there will be no voice…
My sister once said to me, sharing something they were teaching in her org’s drama classes, this phrase…the place from which we start, and something to say to yourself:
“I am enough”
I look forward to your posts–not because they are well written (which…they ARE)…not because they are informative (which they ARE), not because they bring light to places and things and people and hardships that I would have known nothing about (which they DO)…
but because I know YOU from how you communicate, how I feel I know you…
all that is not to make you feel more stressed about being in a silent place…
but to encourage you that I like all of you…even the silent/angsty/worried Kathy.
Let her have some quiet. Let her dance in the tropical winds…let her make a lovely meal for her love…let her sit in the silence…and accept that it is part of why, when she has the words to share…they are so powerful and uniquely Kathy.
What can I say, Jane? Thank you from the bottom of my heart! You are too dear for words. Thank you!
Beautiful poem. Beautiful words. Give yourself time.
I can’t say it any better than Jane did.
Be kind to yourself.
Thank you, Lisa! I’m so glad you liked the poem! Cool!
I hate that you are feeling the writer’s funk right now. With that being said, I LOVE this poem. “paying homage to palms” is brilliant. You will find the words soon, and we will be right here cheering you on until you do 🙂
Thanks, Tori! Glad you enjoyed the poem. I hate the funk! Hate. It.
Thanks for the cheers, my friend!
Enjoyed your poem….most of us have those blocks from time to time.
These things pass. Today was actually better, as you noted. Thanks, Charlie!
How I have come to love your post about Haiti, about you, about Sara, about yourlife, and now your poem.
I am not a writer, but from the little I have done, the more one panics from having nothing to write the more one locks the cells up.
jane has given the best advise — “Let her have some quiet. Let her dance in the tropical winds…let her make a lovely meal for her love…let her sit in the silence…and accept that it is part of why, when she has the words to share…they are so powerful and uniquely Kathy.”
Today is sure proph you still have it.
I think that was suppose to be proof.
Yes, thanks, again!
Thanks, Ann, for this lovely and encouraging comment. You are dear! You are so right–the more one panics, “the more one locks the cells up.” Well said. True almost on a cellular level. I’m so glad you are reading, Ann!
Beautiful words and powerful imagery. Thank you for sharing it with us.
As for the angst, I always found it best to go do something different for a while. Have fun and just relax. 🙂
Thanks, Robin. Glad you enjoyed the poem. I think you are right, though, a bit of a rest is good. Hope you too have a restful weekend!