The Setting:
Lexington, Kentucky.
Downtown.
An old house on 4th Street.
The Action:
The Characters:
Sara: an international aid worker on “sabbatical.”
Kathy: Sara’s partner/artist/writer/blogger/(hoarder, according to Sara)
The Dialogue:
Sara has officially banned me from my studio.
Forced me out, forced her way in–
“Spring cleaning,” Sara claims!
Admittedly the place needs tidying—a sponge, a mop—
“A back hoe,” Sara interrupts.
Yeah, yeah, whatever!
But I’m nervous.
It’s a sacred space.
With sacred stuff.
“Emphasis on stuff,” Sara shouts.
If you insist.
I’m just afraid of all the papers she’ll toss, the receipts, the labels, lids.
“The empty tin cans,” Sara adds.
Yeah, but I’m a collage artist, a mixed-media, paper-lovin’–
“Shit-lovin’s more like it!”
What does this tell you about us? What does it tell you about who I am and who she is and why we’re together?
Read between the lines, my friends—cause we’re a match made in–
“Heaven!” Sara reminds me, headin’ out to the trash with another load of–
My treasures!
(Guess you gotta do this every decade or two—right?)
“Disaster response! My day job’s in disaster response.” Sara reminds all of you.
Enough said———————————
Kathryn M. McCullough 
LOL This is a discussion which plays out in our house about once a month!
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I thought of you when I wrote this–that it would amuse you in particular–My Sara is your Willie, for sure!
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LOL!
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I laughed at this one myself! What can I say. Sometimes you just can’t make this shit” up! (Forgive the expletive, please.)
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Haha! You two are perfect for eachother! No worries, I lean towards “shit-lovin'” myself. I’ve had to move my “clutter” to the closet now that The Man Child can climb and chew things 😦
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Sara’s movin’ mine on out the the curb! I may be able to walk through the space in another day or two–who knows!
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Some help though appreciated is sometimes nerve racking. 🙂
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I live in fear and trembling of Sara’s “cleaning.” It usually means sacrifice on my part–oh, the tin cans, labels, lids!
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This is Fabulous!
Choose Happiness!
Jennifer
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So glad this one amused you! Thanks for reading–hope you’ll stop by again!
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Hahaha– I hope your studio makes it through the ordeal somewhat intact! I’m embarrassed to admit this, but I actually watched an episode of that “Hoarders” show where a woman was a ‘found objects’ artist and had stuffed her house TO THE TOP with crap, um, I mean *scraps*. I’m sure your studio pales in comparison to this woman’s atrocious surroundings, so good luck getting through the decluttering trauma with your sanity (and loving relationship!)
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Actually, no one walking into my studio even in it’s current/soon-to-be-former state would have seen a problem. Most of the stuff is neatly contained. There’s just too much of it. I can’t or won’t do it, so the woman I love can have at it. I’ve set guidelines, to be sure.
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I feel your pain, Kathy…you are much more trusting than I…if somebody went through my stuff and threw things away without asking me, there might be bloodshed…
Hugs,
Wendy
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Your comment made me laugh out loud, Wendy! Bloodshed–no that would be a couple posts ago–the one about “My Personal Pound of Flesh.” And there could still be bloodshed on this front, but I’ve set some guidelines, so I think we’re safe. Relationship in tact.
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Here’s a post I wrote last September…pay special attention to paragraph #3: http://writerwoman61.wordpress.com/2010/09/30/a-little-to-the-left/
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I just read your post! How hysterical! Thanks so much for pointing me in that direction. What a hoot!
Who would read section 3 of the newspaper before section 1? Barbarians!
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“Hello. My name is Rumbly and I am a hoarder.”
I am having a party tomorrow night. Can Sara help me get ready? Afterwards she can help me with the “Closet of Doom.” Understand and totally love your post.
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“Hello Rumbly.”
I’ll check Sara’s schedule here in a minute, though it’s entirely possible she’ll still be buried under mountains of my stuff through the end of the day. Think you can postpone your party till the weekend? LOL
Thanks so much for reading–hope you’ll stop by my cluttered place again.
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Hahahah- Shit lovin’ – Spouse and I have been compared to “Oscar and Felix”- I feel your pain. I’ve been known to frantically run to the garbage in order to fish out something he’s pitched. And then sometimes I don’t notice. THe funniest part of this post- to me- is envisioning your frantic reaction to her backing up the back hoe. Hilarious.
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I’ve been sneaking up at night and looking through the trash bags to be sure there’s nothing I need to salvage! She seems to want to throw away maps. I love maps! It’s not like we have a huge surplus. Alas!
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Smiling – cuz I need a Sara! I am feeling for you at the same time. Its hard to part with our treasures.
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Saras can be handy to have around. I guess someone has to make the tough calls and decide what goes. Thanks so much for reading and commentling. Hope you’ll come by again!
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I used to be the Sara in my house. Then I gave up. (Just a little bit. Not completely.) Now, once in a great while, my husband might notice all the clutter. He might even “clean it up” which means he makes piles of things he doesn’t know what to do with and then sets them on my side of the bed so that I find them just when I’m ready to crawl in for the night.
What a guy!
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I like to make piles, also. However, I would NEVER put them on Sara’s side of the bed. If I did that, when I woke up in the morning, it would all be gone–trashed–history! LOL
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I think I need a person like Sara as well, especially since I’m moving at the end of the month. LOL!
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Wow, you’re moving. That’s a lot of work. Shall I send Sara your way?
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