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Meteorological Moanings of a Climatically-Challenged Heat Hater


I never thought I’d say this—

—But, it’s actually cold in Kentucky.

I didn't want to catch a cold.

Clearly, “cold” is a relative term.  By “cold” I don’t mean “frigid”—as in arctic cold.  But it’s “cold” compared to what it has been.  It’s “cold” compared to what it should be this time of year.

I’m not complaining, however.  No, I’m far from complaining.  Rather, I’m lovin’ it—snuggling-down-under-the-blankets lovin’ it—drinking-steaming-cups-of-hot-tea lovin’ it.

You get the picture.

However, you should also know that I hate heat.  I abhor it, actually.  Yet for the past two years I have lived in infernally hot places—inhumanly humid places—so damn hot you think your skin might melt—or soften to the consistency of butter, at the very least. 

Two years ago my partner and I moved with our dogs to Vietnam, and then lived last year in Haiti.  Vietnam was definitely the hotter of the two places, but living in a place like Port-au-Prince where access to electricity is inconsistent at best meant air conditioning was rare, and we often didn’t have the power to run even a fan.   

Certainly, this exposure to our planet’s “hot spots” has helped me tolerate the “heat” we have in Kentucky.  This means I’ve complained about the heat only a little this July and August—and not so much for Sara’s sake, to save her from my heat-related commentary, the meteorological moanings of the climatically challenged.

(She insists that if it’s hot, I invariably comment on the degree of heat, usually with at least a borderline whine.  I don’t deny noting that it’s hot, but I flatly refuse to accept that I whine in any situation where that whining is not thermostatically justified—an out-and-out, sanity-maintaining necessity in circumstances of hellacious and infernal heat—allowing me to blow off steam, if you will.  Far be it from me to “make much ado” if I don’t need to!  You understand, don’t you?)

At any rate, I’ve not whined, and certainly not moaned, because I’ve actually acclimated a bit to the heat.  And Kentucky heat is clearly less oppressive than the “hot” that is Hanoi in summer or Texas under a Rick Perry administration.  Kentucky is clearly in the minor leagues compared to Vietnam, not to mention Houston.  It’s hot, yes, but ungodly and inhumanely hot?  Probably not.

Nonetheless, I’m welcoming my break from summer heat.  I’m bundled up in sweatshirt and heavy socks—breathing deeply of the crisp and almost chill.

Even Lucy's wearing her winter coat.

Thank God for fall-fresh and fleece-deep.

I never thought I’d say this—

—But it’s actually cold in Kentucky.

And I’m not even complaining—because, God knows, I’m capable of that!

24 thoughts on “Meteorological Moanings of a Climatically-Challenged Heat Hater”

  2. I positively loathe being hot – and I live in the sub tropics. I have solved this by buying a house in Italy. I leave Brisbane for most of summer and go to the lovely cold of winter in Italy and then come back to Brisbane for a perfect winter. What could be better? Most people seek summer, but I just love winter, spring and autumn and do what I can to avoid summer.

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  5. Good Lord Woman! I got a chill just looking at that picture! You and Sara need to find another mission to a tropical climate…..like right now! 🙂

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      • I know what you mean 🙂 The funniest things can make our hearts just burst with love!
        The weather here really heated up for a couple of days….that was a prelude to the most awesome thunderstorm so far this monsoon season that Karachi experienced. I just sat cross-legged on the terracotta floor of my courtyard and got soaked to the skin in the cold cold rain, and enjoyed it as thoroughly as only a Karachiite can. It was heavenly 🙂

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      • How wonderful that sounds. Talk about an amazing outdoor shower! They seem to be all the rage on home decorating shows here in the US, but you had the real thing! I love it! Happy weekend to you, my friend!

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