For whatever reason, I don’t do well with change. I don’t do well with uncertainty. I don’t do well with loosening my white-knuckled grip, that over-my-dead-body, I’ll-be-damned grip on absolute control of almost everything. I like to know what’s coming and where I’m going because of it.
Bottom line: I’m kind of a control freak in this regard–not good–and something I’m far from proud of.
But when your partner works in disaster response, life is almost always about change, adjusting to change, to sudden shifts, loosening that grip. That’s the thing about disasters. They’re so, well, disastrous. And you never know when they’re coming. You never know where. You never know when.
So in honor of my own issues with uncertainty and in anticipation of Mindy’s post tomorrow about accepting change, today I bring you the “Top 10 Things to Remember about Letting Go.”
- That letting go is about control and a willingness to give it up.
- That letting go is about strength.
- That letting go is about tomorrow.
- That tomorrow is coming soon. (Remember Little Orphan Annie’s anthem to tomorrow: “Tomorrow, tomorrow. I love you tomorrow. You’re only a day away.”)
- That letting go means waiting willingly for what’s to come.
- That it sometimes means “good-bye.”
- That it often means “adjust.”
- That it forces us toward faith.
- That it requires us to trust.
- That it nudges us toward tomorrow, that it requires us to trust that God, or the universe, or the kind hand of a friend will take us where weeed to go.
The bottom line is this: I can no longer be a tip-toed toddler teetering toward tomorrow. Neither, at the other extreme, can I be a control freak, forecasting my own future, frothing to make it less frontier and more toddler-friendly.
I need to remember what Joseph Campbell said: “We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting.”
So, yes, letting go is often about waiting.
And it’s also always about accepting–
Letting go, letting love.