Borderline Bitchy, Borderline Pathetic or Both?


Monday, March 23, 2009

Today has been a marathon of nonstop activity, tolerable in and of itself, but needing now to blog seems  more than I can manage.  Not that I’m incapable of assembling words into sentences and sentences into paragraphs–I’m bothered more by the creative nature of the task.  I feel too depleted to write anything of merit, anything remotely meaningful, anything that any human being of even reasonable intelligence would want to read.  So you are hereby warned.  Read on and risk–risk what, I’m not sure.  Only beware.  Beware of boredom.  Beware of the unfun.  Beware of  borderline bitchiness on my part.

But, bitchy or not, I should mention that this evening Ralph is recovering from knee surgery–barely able to walk more than a few feet before needing to be carried.  I feel badly for him, as he’s clearly in pain.  Between the two of us, he’s the one deserving empathy.

But then again, S. deserves care and concern, as well.  Yesterday she moved into our Saigon apartment, and today she’s off on another trip–this time to Hanoi.  She’s got to be exhausted.

Instead, I’m the one barely able to keep my eyes open.  I think I’ll call it quits for the evening.  I think I’ll close my eyes and sleep my way to a better day.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

And now that  day has  arrived–not immensely better, but indeed a different day.   It’s Tuesday morning, and I’m at school, helping students do research in Young Library.  Unfortunately I don’t feel motivated to do much of anything productive with the next several hours.  I basically feel “blah.”  I think I’m missing S.

Actually I know I’m homesick for her.  She’s been gone for more than 3 weeks, and I’m beginning to tire of doing household chores alone, eating alone, sleeping alone, reading alone–essentially all activities done alone  deplete me.  And interacting with friends and family may help a bit–but not enough and not for long.  Good God–I sound pathetic.  Perhaps, I am pathetic.

Actually, I have accomplished an amazing amount since this morning when I felt so unmotivated–completed three loads of laundry and dusted  both our  library and  bedroom.  Okay, these may not be extraordinary achievements for an afternoon–not when I consider the amount my sister has to do when she gets home from work well into the evening, needing still to cook dinner, feed kids, help kids with homework, and complete the multitude of other duties motherhood requires.  So, hell, I have it made with only laundry, dusting, and care of one three-legged dog to do in an afternoon.  By the way, S. and I were wondering the other day what it might say about us that we currently have two animals that  function on only three legs.  Would that make us or them pathetic?

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